Good morning, all! I hope you've all been well in my absence. I just got home from a nice weekend with fellow Hagamaroes, and I thought I'd let you know how things went. I took the liberty to pack a journal for this occasion, knowing that it would indeed be filled with memorable events...I had no clue how well that plan would work out....so here is my detailed account of our weekend in Prairie du Chien. You're welcome.
3:15 p.m. Kim walks in the room in a cute little dress, lifts up the back to show off her bare buns. Somebunny forgot their underwear.
3:16 p.m. Kim is wearing my purple underwear.
4:30: Lady on bus (whom we've dubbed Ms. George from her freckled arms that are similar to our uncle George's) leans over to her seat mate and says "wanna feel how wet I am down here?" April and I looked at one another in amazement and cheersed our Busch Lights, and then threw up all over in our heads.
5:00: Freckled guy to the left (whom we've also taken to call George) leans over to his buddy and says, "ya know, the girl on my facebook that I like, with the big titties...end scene.
9:25: (Side note: I wish you could see the handwriting on this entry) Lirp says, 'Travis Tritt looks like a cross between Ronnie Dunn and Billy Ray!' I just read on the Facebook that he was 'visibly drunk'. Apparently when one is drunk, they can't make these types of judgements. I thought he was fine.
7:00 a.m.: The breakfast sausage smells like pot. Lirp Dogg has changed her name to Lirp Lion. Kim threw away my underwear.
7:30: April starts cleaning the chocolate from the mess in her purse. A rousing game of 'poop or chocolate' ensues.
10:04: April looks at me and says, 'its 10, we can put vodka in our coffee now". Ok...I'll go along with this.
Random untimed note: Waiting in line for shuttles last night a bus full of people slows in front of us, a ding dong looks around and says, 'are they dropping people off?' I sarcastically say, yeah, they're coming from another concert.' She snarks back at me, 'well you don't have to be so mean about it :(' I almost got punched.
11:05 I just tweezed a stray pube from Trisha's forearm.
11:41: About 30 minutes ago April started cleaning the chocolate off all the stuff in her purse. We're going to write an apology note for the white washcloth that looks like its covered in shit. She's almost done.
12:19: Maid service came in and switched out towels and emptied trash cans. One of them carried on a conversation with April while she brushed her teeth and then touched her arm while telling us to enjoy our weekend. It was weird.
12:32: Kim silently walked out of the room to go back to shower. She crop dusted on her way out. I called her room saying only, 'I know what you did' and hung up. We could hear her giggling thru the wall.
2:04: 'Kim, you look like a little Chinese lady, would you do my nails?'
2:49: Kim and Trisha met members of Gary Allen's band. Tisha farted. They have already reserved their room for next year, the Fur Trader Suite.
3:06 Traffie's first band spotting from her post on the AC unit.
3:10: Talked with Levi and Gary Allen thru the hotel window. They like us.
3:42: Gary Allen's band member, Levi took a drink out of Traffie's cup. Her brush with fame.
4:27: Kim got walked in on in the porta potties by an old dude. I think she'll lock the door next time.
5:49: One man Memorial Day parade as Darryl Worely sings, "Have you Forgotten' he is wearing camo shorts, a cutoff t-shirt and carrying a huge American flag. We later got a picture with him.
11:26: Kip and Tosh - night night snorey-snorey panks (this is word for word from the journal).
11:30: Mike and Steve Spalla show up having gotten a ride from the concert grounds by the porta potty truck.
11:45: Val to April: Do you have enough vodka in there?
April: Don't question my altacohol intake?
Val: Ok then, I won't.
7:30 a.m.: April: 'these jeans are awful hot to sleep in.'
9:30: on the way home...Val to April: Were you talking about corn last night? Like the sneaky corn that sprouts up in the middle of beans?'
April: 'It's called volunteer corn. Not sneaky corn.'
Until next year....